Hello

Originally this email was going to be about our trip to Spokane where I was going to talk about the Professional Photographers of Washington 2026 Innovate Conference, where Lara became PPW President and was given the Professional Photographers of America National Award, for service to professional photography. But I really just wanted to write about the small dog that we all watched pee right into another photographer’s gear bag. That little dog completely soaked a $3k lens while 30 photographers stood frozen in shock.

But all that takes a back seat to my dinner decision the day we got back from the conference. I had the idea to get a take and bake pizza from the grocery store and load it up with lots of veggies: green and red peppers and onions. I tried to fit all the veggies on the pizza but we had a respectable pile for leftovers.

We had a session downtown the next morning and La got up early, got ready, and dumped all the leftover veggies into a gigantic egg scramble. I got out of bed, we ate like kings, and I got ready to go. We drove to the studio, loaded the gear into the Jeep, and I think I mentioned that we were exactly right on time to leave, and it’s rush hour, and… That’s when I noticed the smell from the garbage in the garage. I figured it’d been warm the last few days and we’d only been in the garage for a short time but boy did it stink.

I looked over at the dumpsters and they were empty. I thought maybe we’d left some food in the car from the trip? Oh no. I checked my pits. Not me. Oh no. I’m starting to panic. I looked at La. She looked at me. Please no. I leaned over and gave her a sniff. “La, get out of the car!”

I ran around the Jeep and gave her shirt a sniff. It was bad. Then I sniffed her hair. Sweet holy mother, “La, it’s the goddamned onions from breakfast! You totally smell like B.O.!”

La had gotten ready before me, got dressed, and made breakfast with those veggies - leftover stink-butt onions - from the night before. She totally absorbed all that onion smell in her clothes and her hair. Neither of us had noticed but she’d become a gigantic walking onion-induced B.O. bomb. My shooter smelled like she spent the night sleeping in the dumpster.

We jumped back into the car and drove home with all the windows down. La ran into the house and in five minutes shampooed and conditioned her hair in the sink, soaped herself down, changed her clothes, jumped back into the Jeep and off we went. A five-minute B.O. penalty.

We hauled our way downtown with the vents cranked to dry La’s hair and the good news was I somehow managed to get us down there a minute early. The bad news was we were at the wrong building. The good news is the session went off without a hitch and the client was very happy and none the wiser.

I guess the point in my sharing all this with you is we are absolute warriors when it comes to your session. There’s nothing that can stop us from making sure your session comes off without a hitch, stress free. Well, stress free for you at least, and I personally guarantee we’ll be there, on time and smelling great.

Thanks,

Art Grauer

Studio Manager, Assistant, Chief Cook & Bottle Washer

Lara Grauer Photography

206-724-2177